The Survivor

Something came in the night
Breathless
surreptitiousness of dark
with a hunger I don’t
think I’ve ever experienced

I didn’t hear the heinous sounds
And I hesitate to imagine them, either
The slaughter
Ten times over
How, we will never know

The warmth, evaporating,
as the blood trickled out
Food enough for months
A jackpot, unimaginable
I hope they ate every bite
Feather, flesh, organs and blood
Not a single chicken thing wasted
For my loves, the most divine death

You, a shadow in the dark,
Clinging preposterously to life

Were you the fastest? No.
Were you the bravest? No.
Were you the prettiest? No.
Were you the strongest? No.
An oversight?
An error?
An interruption … ?
The rest of your family
murdered and gone
Was it fated that way?

You were the one with the greatest hope
Unflinching hope
A loyalty to hope that reminds me of my own.

Is that why, then,
I can’t bear to look at you?
Why don’t I revere you?
Embrace you?
Love you all the more?
Now, my only precious
Instead, you wreak to me of death
And grief
And blackness

I hope you can forgive my foibles
My embarrassing weakness
It’s a strong day when I can come to you
and say hello.

Please survive this winter. I need more time.